To Journal Is To Know Yourself

What are you really like? Document your life and find out.

Many of us never actually take the time to truly understand ourselves. We get into our routines, and we think that simply being us is enough of an understanding. And it’s not; we are all so much more deeply affected by the things in our lives than we realize. Kamala was right: we really do exist in the context of all in which we live and what came before us.

A fantastic tool in understanding the proverbial coconut tree you just fell out of is a journal. I have had my journal since 2017 - a classic black, lined Moleskine. I got it in Berlin, and its first use was to keep track of what I did throughout my 2-week trip. From there, it sat in a drawer for years, briefly coming out of retirement in 2019 to be used as a notebook for meetings. Then in 2023, I started law school and began journaling more regularly. I’m not super consistent. Sometimes it’s one entry a month. Sometimes it’s 3-4 times a week. It kind of depends on my emotional needs to be honest, but I will try to check in even when I am in a good place.

I know everyone talks about journaling, so maybe it’s just abstract background noise to you. But if you get the journal, write in it semi-regularly, and you’re brutally honest about what is happening and how you’re feeling, then you have a written account of who you are and how you react to what’s going on. And you’ll get to know yourself in reading old entries.

I also recommend reading your entries aloud, one after the other, once you’ve been at it for a while. You can hear the patterns and trends. If you have someone you can be vulnerable with, read it to them. I read my entries to my sister, and it was immensely helpful to hear myself out loud. I also loved having someone (who knows me very well) giving me feedback and talking through the entries with them.

I struggle with Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) and, for years, it was misdiagnosed as bipolar disorder. I tend to write in my journal more when I am going through an emotionally turbulent time. So, after years of semi-regular journaling, I have a decent account of what I was going through. I could see the regular patterns and read about experiencing the same feelings on a continuous cycle. Very helpful to have and to relay to my doctor for a more accurate diagnosis.

Having the journal helped me see the problem more clearly. I might not have taken it as seriously or prioritized working on myself without the glaring proof. It might have been easier to think, “whatever, I was just going through something”. But when you’re “going through something” regularly, it’s not a thing, it’s a pattern.

Even if you don’t have anything emotionally messy going on, I still suggest journaling. Write about the mundane, your friends, what you have planned for next week, etc. Get to know yourself by reading your autobiography.